Tuesday, December 14, 2010

a blue Christmas?

I am really shocked at my own lack of bloginess. Has it really been a month? Yep, almost. I can't say I've been too busy to write, cuz I've sat here and stared at the screen multiple times, only to click away without typing a single word. For some reason, visiting my own blog has just made me a little sad. Maybe it's because when I visit all my bloggy friends I see their gorgeously decorated for Christmas homes, and I look at mine, which has been half-done for weeks now....and I'm not sure I have the motivation to finish. Maybe it's because I see such cute and creative projects they're doing and I haven't done a single one, and don't really feel like I have a drop of creativity flowing right now. Maybe it's because I see suggestions for Christmas on a 'budget' and think - "your idea of a budget and mine must be different...". In any case, this season has been a bit of a struggle this year, and I'm really not sure why. Nothing is all that different. In fact, I had a good jump on things, am probably more organized than any other year, and am almost finished with my shopping - earliest ever for me! I've had several evenings to just hang with the fam, and watch Christmas movies or specials on TV. The shopping hasn't been overly stressful (other than the $$ part) and I am so grateful that my kids aren't like "gimme, gimme, GIMME" about things.

So what's so off-kilter then this year? I honestly don't know. I'm mostly enjoying the season, with just some twinges of sadness. Mainly about the way that time changes things, I guess. People, relationships, situations. I love little changes, but sure do hate big ones. I think rather than fussing over all the 'trappings' of Christmas, which normally I truly do love, I may just reflect, pray and appreciate my blessings. And if that inspires some more decorating, or baking or project making, then great. And if not, Christmas will come just the same. And I'll enjoy it, because I have awesome friends, and a most precious family, not because I have 10 different varieties of cookies, and some greens and berries placed just so. And I guess that's what really matters anyway.

(That all being said, don't be surprised if for some reason I do have sudden sweep of holiday cheer and end up posting pics of projects and decorating after all!!) :D


Laura said...

i maybe have 'blue christmas' stuck in my head all day now... but it's worth it, cause you finally blogged :)

Holly said...

Happy to see ya blog! Sorry your feeling sad! I gotta say, I got my house done (as much as I do with small children!), most of my shopping done, and it's even very cold and we've had snow already and I'm not much in the holiday cheer either! I like you and hopeful it will come in the next few days!